First and foremost, I am grateful for my incredible friends. When in a time of dwelling–a low period–it’s hard to count these types of blessings, but I am reminded, as of late, what a wonderful circle of people I have in my life. They are people who I can look in the eye and from whom I can receive constructive criticism–something with which I was not blessed when it comes to receiving it from the average person.
Today, my friend approached me, after having read yesterday’s entry (which is another thing I’m grateful for–that my friends actually read and enjoy what I have to say), and added on to the “ovals” or “circles” metaphor, giving me another metaphor to add to my bag of fancy self-help figurative language.
He compared any sort of change in attitude or self-training to grass. When we first walk atop grass, we tend to not see the path that we’ve made. The grass seems rather untouched. Due to its resilience, similar to how resilient both our good and bad habits tend to be, the grass perks back up, and to the naked eye its hard to notice any change. However, immediately after, while it may not look much different, there has, in fact, been a change, even if that change is microscopic.
That’s why it’s so hard for us to get rid of old habits and get into new ones. We do them for a week, maybe two, and don’t perceive any immediate improvement; there is no instant gratification. In effect, we decide to quit this new habit, because hey, it’s a hell of a lot more work and not really getting us anywhere in the first place. But what we fail to realize is if we continue to walk over that same “grass” over and over, the indentation becomes mildly noticeable–eventually. What’s more, it eventually becomes a path on which we can walk. It becomes something noticeable, almost semi-permanent, if we continue to walk on it.
I can’t honestly tell you that I feel more present or less anxious after practicing gratitude for a week now, but I can tell you that I’m going to continue drawing my ovals and blazing my path through this open grassy field. All in all, I’m thankful for the path I’ve treaded and for the grass I’ve “bent” so far, because it’s a damn good start and a step in the right direction, and it has made me realize that there is a lot more to be grateful for than I was paying attention to previously.